1. Sufficient earth to completely cover the casket. It is advisable to have enough earth readily available, along with 3-4 shovels for the burial.

2. A cement liner: It is suggested to have a cement liner available during the service to cover the casket in case there is an insufficient amount of earth.

3. A pine box: It is common to use a pine box as the casket for the deceased.

4. A cement liner: This refers to a liner made of cement, which provides additional protection for the casket during the burial process.

1) Non leather shoes or slippers to change into at the end of the service.( if not avable put some dirt into the shoe)

2) A shirt or jacket that you don’t mind tearing. (not an undershirt)

3) Notes to deliver a eulogy

1. No flowers, music, food (this is solemn not festive)

2. Rabbi recites Psalms and Eulogy

3. Kriah (rending of garments) is performed by the mourners.

4. Requesting forgiveness

5. Family members remarks

6. Kel Molay Rachamim

7. Accompany the casket to the hearse

• Focus: is on honoring the deceased more than comforting mourners, Judaism doesn’t hide from or to numb the grief. In fact, mourning is important passage for mourner before re-entering life.

• Eulogy: Emphasis on higher spiritual matters. True honor and respect for deceased is to recall his/her fine character traits, special values Mitzvot that they excelled in. Nice to share short anecdotes about them that will inspire the living to increase their commitment to those values and Jewish observance. Note: Sages teach that until burial deceased hear the remarks said about him/her, therefore relatives should be careful as to how they speak. Additionally, Judgment is rendered in Heaven and “testimony” is heard on High. Words should therefore be carefully chosen so as not to praise the deceased excessively nor underservingly, as an accounting will be demanded from him/her above.

• Kriah: Should be performed by son, daughter, brother, sister, half-brother and half-sister. Note: The modern innovation to use a ribbon doesn’t suffice to fulfill Biblical obligation. A child tears on left side, all others tear on right. One need not tear an overcoat only jacket or shirt underneath. Woman should wear a shirt underneath the shirt they will tear so as to remain modest. (Cut four inches at least). The shirt should be worn throughout the seven-day Shiva period.

• Forgiveness: Family members should stand individually in front of casket to forgive and request forgiveness. Other relatives and friends can do so following the service.

a) Casket is carried by Jewish men to the hearse, Psalms recited.

b) Seven “rests” are made on the way.

c) Parting with deceased

d) Lowering casket

e) Mitzvah to bury our deceased. Shovel shouldn’t be passed from one to another. Casket should be completely covered by earth before cemetery workers complete job.

f) Tziduk Hadin prayer- acceptance of G-d’s decree.

g) Graveside Kaddish (if ten Jewish men present) (Important Note: The casket must be i) covered by earth or the very least by the CEMENT liner prior to the recitation of kaddish

h) Removal of leather shoes, mourning begins.

i) Nechama- condolence: two rows formed, one men, other woman. Condolence prayer is said.

j) Washing hands: don’t dry so memory of deceased lingers.

At the Shiva home: “Seudat havra'ah” served.

a) Candle (7 day) b) Low stools

c) Cover the mirrors d) Kosher refreshments or brunch, ( eggs and bagels are served during the Seudat havra'ah)

e) Kaddish should be said at a Minyan Service, great merit for soul

f) Shiva is a time to mourn and reflect on purpose of life & the loss of a loved one, don’t jump back into daily routine, work etc. No attending festive occasions etc.